KAYLA GARABEDIAN
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Poetry 

May 08th, 2022

5/11/2020

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Stupid fucking bird.
That’s all love is
A fucking bird you can never quite tie down
Perhaps you’ll come across a feather
Floating down from the heavens
A tickle to tease you
Perhaps you’ll get your moonlit love scene under the stars
A fucking fleeting moment
Embers of that kind never last
It’s the cold stones around the campfire that never leave
Strong bold and dependable
Why are we so drawn to what may burn us
Instead of what can build us?

​
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May 10th, 2022

5/10/2020

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Picture
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Pretty or Ugly?

5/10/2020

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Pink tree tops reflecting the setting sun
Or
Plastic scraps caught on the fingers of trees?


Stars on a wintery night, glistening like crystals 
Or
Dreary cold, dead silence and frostbite?

Sun rays peeking through sleepy woods, glinting off melting puddles 

Or
Muddy booby traps waiting to get stuck on your shoes?


The images 
rush             past me 
as the car     s    p    e    e    d    s     d  o  w  n  thehighway. 
I reflect.


A church hill painted red
    A Christmas tree farm
        Abandoned antiques



A quaint town we     d    r    i    v   e    through, on THE way HoMe.
The windows provide entertainment, 
Like a projector on a movie screen in a theater


Warm gold and shadow intermingling with one another on barren grass
Or
Dead grass?

Frozen lakes, old wooden bird houses
Or

Abandoned homes?


I add SoUnd to the film 
playing outside of the car windOw
With my thoughts, asking 
where 
how 
when and what?


Unkempt lists of incomplete fragments jotted down to return to when time allows
Or

Diamond thoughts left unsaid, unheard, and unloved.


I swear my best ideas only decide to pop into existence
When I have no way or time or hands to save them
While roads highways
Towns and cities 
R    u    s    h     past me
Andblurtogether
            ...Along with my thoughts


Thinking in and of itself is a type of art form good or bad
    Looking in from the outside always makes things look more exciting
    It’s not as pretty once you’re inside
        Telling only one side of the story, woven by eloquent lies



It’s like having the sun on my face 
and     m    o    v    i   n   g    at 75 mph 
Opens up a different dimension inside my mind
Where all of the secrets of the world 
lie waiting for me to unlock


A house alive with green and purple amongst drab gray shacks
Or

Abandoned buildings falling apart, being taken over by green.


Fading round smoky circle in the blue sky
Or
Pointless observation.


The point of a human life --of my life
Always comes up in my internal conversation
With the     r   o   a   d    ThE TrEEs, and the sky 
hugging my car as I move


Realizing human connection is all we have.
Learning the nature of oblivion.
    Becoming one with the world in isolation.


And then I sit and ruminate, homebound still
What of the faces and places I do not pass by 
On my journey home? 
What do I see when I     p    r   o   j   e   c   t    my soul 
across the globe?


Droplets leaking down grimy tear streaked faces, fed up with inequality. Voices screaming their anguish
Or
Peace.

People trapped, glued to a slab a metal fit to you palm, mesmerized by blue light frequency

Or
Freedom.


Are the lines we draw black and white? What bright colors do we paint 
Inequality, 
greed, 
       arrogance, 
         hate, 
    and fear 
to overlook their dEforMitieS and keep the FlaWed pieces in our mosaic? 
Why do we study     imaginary boundaries     on maps in classrooms instead of 
     the ones                             between 
Peo  Ple   ?


I have no answer
As I turn the key
And turn off the ignition
I wrestle with the question
What is this world we live in?


Pretty or ugly
Or

Ugly 
Or
Pretty?













​
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Glass Trap

5/6/2020

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My Mind is a glass box
Locked from the inside
I am trapped

Pressing my face against the cool surface
My in-ability to speak tightens the small squareness of my prison
My mind is a glass box

On the inside looking out
​I reach out, but only feel icy walls and cold stares
I am trapped

Like a one-way mirror
A stone-faced expression conceals my zigzagging thoughts
My mind is a glass box

Doomed to look on and never touch
No one outside can hear me scream
“I am trapped!”

Driven by silence and insanity
Brought on by my chains
And years of my silent pleas
Falling on deaf ears...

I lay a fist on the wall, another, then another
A web, it splinters, shatters, and cracks
My mind is a glass box
But I am no longer trapped.

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Measurements

5/6/2020

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How much do I love you
On a scale of 1 to 10? 

    I ponder.

Your question hits me in the stomach

How can I measure my feelings 
In a calibration so calculated
And cold?

It’s like asking an astrophysicist
To put a boundary
On outer space

A scale would give you a number
But words would tell you what I mean

What does it even mean to say I love you?
That I’ll send you presents on your birthday
Whisper sweet words when nothing feels okay?
Travel to the moon and back
Promise you the stars?
Buy you a boat, horse, fast cars


Or would this transaction surpass monetary action?
    I’d love you even if we lived on nothing but potatoes.


        Then I wonder…            
Isn’t love a two way street?

A scale would give you a number
But words would tell you what I mean

Will you squeeze me so tight
To make up after a big fight?

Send me chocolates on Valentine’s day
And join me in bed at the end of the day?
Know all of my little habits and quirks
Staying with me despite them

And making long distances work?

If that is so
Then I’d say that is the scale

I love you this much, I say
Holding out my arms, widespread
It doesn’t seem much to you, but it is my whole being and body
I’d give you the universe

A scale would give you a number
But words would tell you what I mean

Now tell me, On a scale of 1 to 10
How much do you love me?

​
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    Author

    Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.

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  • Home
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    • Poetry
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